Week 9 – Liberty and Self Love

Before starting this blog, I always wonder what I’m going to write about!  Then, out of the blue, a topic presents itself and writing the blog seems to help solidify the idea.

One of my PPNs is Liberty.  What a great word.  At first I though that, for me, it meant freedom….never to have to think about money ever again.  So, when I have enough residual income, I have the freedom to travel when and where I like, shop where ever I like, freedom from the concerns of how I am going to pay bills and very importantly,  freedom from having to subject myself to the slavery of a job.  And freedom certainly is all those things for me, but yesterday, I realised that Liberty has another dimension to it that freedom doesn’t have.

Liberty is setting myself free from myself!  Liberating myself from the old thoughts and habits that have been keeping me doing things for people out of guilt or misplaced sense of responsibility…even when those things are not in my best interests.  I have been helping people and constantly threatening my own well being!  What a goose!

Thank goodness we read the scrolls 3 times a day for 30 days….it takes me that long for the whole meaning to sink in!  “I greet this day with love in my heart.  And most of all, I love myself.”  I haven’t been loving myself! I have been putting myself last (is that a woman/mother thing?) and left myself struggling financially and emotionally.  I get it now!  I don’t have to do that any more!  I change my thinking!  I am important!  I am worthy of success! I love myself and want to look after myself to make sure no harm comes to me! Others just have to take responsibility for themselves as do I!  I deserve to be loved for who I am and not what I can do for people!  That is the most liberating thing that has ever happened to me….I love it!  I give thanks for the MKMMA course and that I was fortunate enough to be granted a place on it.  I am truly blessed!

 

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Week 8. Has anyone ever completed The Seven Day Mental Diet?

I live alone much of the time.  I have a flatmate but she spends most of her time at her partner’s home and as a consequence, I am home alone.

I’m not complaining….I like it….I like my own company and it gives me lots of time to think. Lots of time to think!!!  Oh no!  What have I been thinking all these years?  No wonder my life has been a mess!

Thoughts float in and out of my mind at an enormous rate of knots and I found that previously, I hadn’t taken too much notice of them…..that is until I started on The Seven Day Mental Diet!

It’s amazing just how many of my thoughts are negative!  And, until now, I haven’t been aware of them!  I’m finding that, although I am more aware of the negative thoughts now, sometimes they still just creep in….one leads to another….and before I know it, I’ve had a whole negative conversation with myself!  No chance of replacement in seven seconds if the whole conversation is negative, is there?!

I know I’m improving but I’ve barely managed to get through a whole day without having to start again…let alone a week!

I’m fine at work….it has become a habit for me to find the positives there…it’s a tough job and it’s absolutely necessary to stay happy and in many cases….calm.  I find it’s when I’m at home or with my friends after work!  I just seem to slip into the old habits and before I know it…..bang…a whole string of negative thoughts!

I suppose it’s a positive that I’m aware it has happens at all, even though it’s too late for the seven second thought substitution.  And, I am improving all the time….however, it’s going to take me quite some time to manage a whole week at this rate!

A big positive is that I am prepared to put in the time…I have found this one of the most rewarding exercises I have ever done!

OH NO!!!  here’s a thought……was most of this blog one ginormous negative thought!

Sigh! Ok….my week starts from here!

I can be what I will to be….I can be what I will to be…..I can be what I will to be…..

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Week 7 – A lesson learned from an unlikely source.

This week, I had a revelation! Again!!

I work in 2 hostels for a few hours every morning (which is why I am rarely able to participate in the MKMMA Webinars).  These hostels are supported accommodation for people with mental illness, some have physical and mental impairments….some have all three.  They are very vulnerable people who are generally shunned by society and forgotten by family….I am not passing judgement with this statement, it just is what it is.

When I first started working in the hostels, I was ignorant of mental illness, homelessness and the problems associated with both.  To be truthful, when I first walked in, I was terrified.  These people looked different from the people I was used to and I didn’t understand them.  It took a couple of weeks for me to overcome being confronted each day I walked in and to relax enough to get to know the residents.

Since those first weeks, I have come to love many of them and just as with the “outside world” there are some I don’t want to get close to.  I do, however, greet each one of them with a silent “I love you.”  What a difference that makes!

Last week, I was talking to one of the residents.  She has experienced the best and the worst of life.  She has been wealthy and she is now, very poor.  Mostly, she has a joke and a laugh with everyone at the hostel and she always greets me with warmth and good humour.

Last week, she was out of sorts and having a small “episode”.  I was very touched when she came to me looking for the comfort of a hug and a shoulder to cry on.  The episode didn’t last long though…we started talking and somehow got on to the topic of one of Australia’s former Prime Ministers.  It turns out that she went to school with him and coincidentally I had worked with him on a school committee as our children were at the same state primary school.

I told her how I always found him powerful, dynamic and a true leader and she related the story of her experience with him at high school.

He was the nerd!  Nobody liked him because of that but he was the School Captain.  His then girlfriend and future wife, Therese was in the same grade.

At the graduation, he gave the usual School Captain’s speech.  Everyone sniggered when he said, at the age of 17, “Therese and I will get married and we will live in the Lodge (Australian Prime Ministers home). AND I WILL BE PRIME MINISTER!”

Wow!  How good was it for me to hear that!  At the age of 17, he had such belief, vision and focus that he knew he would become Prime Minister and he was so confident that he would do it, that he stated it publicly to a unfriendly, almost hostile audience!  It was an ah ha moment for me…..I knew then that anything was possible for me!  I just had to have vision, belief and focus and be prepared to put in the mental work to get there.

It also seemed ironic to hear the story from a resident in a supported hostel….

Our lessons can come from anywhere!

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Week 6 – Love

Wow!  How good is “The Scroll Marked 2”.

I will greet this day with love in my heart.”

I have been confronted with attempted bullying at my workplace this week and I have been able to withstand it because I am using love as my shield!  It’s awesome!

Each day, I head off to work with love in my heart and I silently tell every person I meet that I love them.  My days have been fantastic.

I am a support worker for people with mental illness and I am very attached to all of my clients.  I have learnt more about myself through working with them than I ever dreamed possible.  My clients are responding amazingly to me when I greet them with love in my heart.  It does become a challenge though when the manager of one of the hostels I work at has a “thing” against me.  Bring it on!  Now I have the weapon and the shield to withstand her manipulative behaviours and the best thing is….I’m not afraid of her.

One of my greatest heroes is Nelson Mandella.  I am in awe of the man who experienced terrible indignities and injustices and remained forgiving, loving and wanting to be of service to his country and its people….all of his people, no matter their colour, religion or past.  He met each day with love in his heart and love was his weapon and shield.  When I am confronted by this woman…I think, what would Nelson do?  I have been greeting her each day with a silent “I love you” and it makes me feel good!

I am blessed to be a part of the MKMMA Program!

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Week 5 – Outside world reflection!

What a week! Do I say that every week? Mmmmmmm….Possibly.

That aside, it was a week of realisations.  The week started well and I have been very successful with my calling this week. Lots of positive responses and appointments.  Breakthrough?  I thought so at first. However, if ever I needed a real life lesson of how my outside world is a reflection of my inside world…this was it!

I think from six presentations, only one actually came about.  Every time, I came back from a presentation, my business partner would ask…”How did it go?”

Each time the answer was the same….”He/she didn’t turn up!”  “He/she wasn’t home!”  I started to THINK my usual thoughts, “Why can’t I find anyone with integrity?  Nobody has any manners these days. You’d think they’d let me know if they couldn’t make it!!!  As soon as I think I have someone I might be able to work with…they disappear!  They were so nice on the phone and now the’ve gone into witness protection! Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah!”

I knew I was responsible for this!  But I kept asking myself, “How do I change this?”  It took a little while before I realised that I actually had, “stinkin’ thinkin.'”  And I believed I was getting on top of my thoughts!  Ha!

I began to work out a mantra I could use to change my thoughts on this’ but I kept running into a brick wall.  I am very lucky to have one of my friends doing the MKMMA course with me and I decided to give her a call.  Mastermind with her so to speak.

We decided I should include a sentence on my Task Card that would change my thinking….oh no.. they are not Task Cards now are they?  They are Service Cards.  PING!  The light bulb went off!

I was treating the calling and the presentations as tasks.  No wonder they had such rotten outcomes.  They were just something I had to crawl through and if the prospect wasn’t there when I called….wasn’t my fault. I had turned up and completed my chore.  It took a while for us to realised that the whole process should be about being of service to others not as a chore that I had to grind through.  So the thinking began to change….after all, I have a fantastic business opportunity that everyone should see.  It’s not a chore….I can change the lives of everyone I meet with this business opportunity!  It’s not all about me!  It’s about how I can be of service to others!  What a revelation, hasn’t Mark been saying that for weeks now?

So, I have written on my Service Card now, “I make 100 calls a month to find at least two excited and committed independent business owners and I promise to work with them to help them change their lives for the better.”  I feel good about the whole process now.  I am not viewing it as a chore anymore….it’s a fantastic way I can be of service to others.

I know that I have a lot of work to do and I know I’m not alone but I am so grateful that we still have five months of MKMMA coaching left….I need it!

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Week 4 – “I can be what I will to be.”

Things are starting to fall into place for me now.  Today is the first day that I haven’t felt “all at sea” with my MKMMA tasks.

There is a calmness and peace about me that hasn’t been there before; the previous 3 weeks seemed like a blur as I started coming to grips with what is required of me.  My week starts later than most as I am not able to watch the Webinar until it shows in the MKMMA Website back office….that’s usually Tuesday (Australian time).  So the time to complete exercises, after viewing the webinar, for me, is shortened by 2 days.  Strangely though, I don’t feel at a disadvantage.  It just makes me have to focus more and get things done in a more organised manner. ( I am a Yellow and organisation is not my strongest point.)

I have always been someone to leave tasks to the last minute (I know….”Do it now.”)  but in this case, I have been forced to do it now else be late with my submissions!  I have total commitment to the MKMMA program and will not allow myself to miss one deadline or exercise….I feel this is an amazing chance for me to get my life on track so I can realise my true potential by getting in touch with my “I”.

I have committed to making 5 calls a day for my business and my old blueprint is making it’s presence felt!  I just tell myself that it is my old blueprint and I am to ignore it and I keep going.  Making the tasks small is a fabulous idea…I have always been very hard on myself by setting huge targets which ensures I don’t hit them.  It’s great to celebrate the small victories.

I love that I am working towards an absence of fear….overcoming fear all the time is exhausting.  I know I radiate courage, confidence and power now!  Much of my life has been lived with a sense of powerlessness.  Parents, teachers, employers, boyfriends and on occasion friends all seemed to have a control on my life.   I gave my power away to them! Now, I have taken responsibility for standing in my own power…it’s so liberating!!

All I have to do is let my light shine!

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Week Three – Chaos returns

Wow….where has this week gone!

I wake at 4.45am….do my MKMMA reading and sitting (I tried sitting in the evening but found that I couldn’t stop my thoughts wandering to parts of my body that were causing me pain!)  The morning is the simple part of the day. Work starts at 6.30am and finishes at 10.30am….it’s a physical job, lots of walking and bending.  I am happy that it is, as I feel I am getting my exercise and being paid for it.  Home by 11am…absolutely starving!  Early lunch and start the midday readings.  I never quite seem to finish them before the phone starts ringing and I have an appointment to go to.  I finish the readings in the car or when I get home….tonight it was 9pm.  Just enough time to write this blog and start the night readings and I wouldn’t have it any other way!

I am seeing changes in my life already.  Today, I had an appointment with a very business savvy entrepreneur!  He “got” my business straight away.  So did the couple I spent time with tonight…they are excited about it…9 out of 10 on the scale of excited! I have done many presentations in the past with a small amount of success.  Today’s 100% strike rate, though has been a foreign concept to me in the past.  I have another presentation tomorrow and know it will be successful too. I am changing my inner world….my external world is following…Yippee!!

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